Tuesday, January 03, 2006

For 2006, I'd Like A........

Blog Ally Mary over at GayOrbit posted a great wish list of things she'd like to see happen in 2006 that I thought I'd shamelessly cut out and bring over here for discussion.

#1 - An acceptance among gay people that Civil Unions or Domestic Partnerships - not marriage - may be the best way to go about securing our relationship with the state.

I give that a qualified, "Yes, BUT....."

To me, DPs and Civil Unions do one thing right -- they acknowledge that gay couples are not heterosexual procreative couples and don't particularly need the same things that those are granted. But what they DON'T do is acknowledge the fact that there aren't too many options for heterosexual NON-procreative relationships that may be in a situation similar to gay couples; it's either all or nothing, and that creates the perception, if not the fact, of inequality of options for glbt couples.

Thus, for 2006, what I'd like to see is a cleaning of the marriage attic -- that is, going through the vaunted "1300 benefits" and tossing them into boxes that say, "Crotchfruit You Produced", "Crotchfruit Someone Else Produced, But You're Raising", and "Crotchfruit-Free, For Now".

Once we get that done, we can subdivide marriage into different models for the discerning consumer with exciting new marketing names. Imagine going up to the clerk's desk and seeing your menu options: "The Cleavers", "The Bradys", and "The (Elton) Johns".

2. The recognition that the “choice”/”born-that-way” dichotomy is terribly reductionist and fails to address the complexity of human experience and biology. Perhaps we can find a new way to discuss the “origins” of homosexuality, one that takes into account human variation and multiplicity.

For some reason, this has been the third rail of gay oratory -- most likely because it would seem to lend credulity to the wingnuts' shriek of "Choice! Choice!" as a reason that queers will spend eternity backstroking through brimstone. Mary is kind in calling it "reductionist"; in my opinion, given the number of gay men I know who have managed a surprising amount of crotchfruit (sorry, I LOVE that word), the fact that not having the preferred target does not completely prevent the gun from going off moves it right up there with "spontaneous generation".

Thus, for 2006, I not only want to see this theory put aside, I want to see people stand up and say, "Yes, I chose to be honest about who I liked best!"

3. Diversity - political, racial, geographic, and more - among gay people becomes highlighted in the gay, as well as mainstream, press.

I give a BIG bravo to Mary for this one, because it really IS the ultimate key to both protecting and securing the rights of gay citizens.

However, what the "gay community" seems to be doing on this one is fixing half of the problem. For instance, Patrick Guerreiro's recent call for gay conservatives to "come out" is a reasonable request, but at the same time, what he and others need to realize is that a lot of us have no interest whatsoever in traditionally what has been the price of admission to be "gay" -- the antireligious, pro-abortion, Democratic-at-all-costs, hate-Republicans-regardless, comparing-the-Pope-and-Bush-to-Hitler rhetoric required to keep your HRC and NGLTF card and bumper stickers.

Thus, for 2006, I would love to get through the year without once being told, "You can't be gay because you...."

4. International gay equality takes center stage in U.S.-based GLBT organizations.

And especially in terms of recognizing the inherent incompatibility of having speakers at events ostensibly held over gay rights who harangue Israel over its repression and praise Palestine over its tolerance.

Thus, for 2006, I would prefer that gay rights organizations and events do a little fact-checking prior to sending out their invitations.

5. And, most importantly, we need to talk about why people continue to watch The L Word despite the fact that the show sucks. The pretty hair? The nice cars? The beautiful outfits? Shane? This question needs to be addressed. Now. Before the girlfriend and I host yet another season premiere party.

Uh....you're on your own on this one, Mary. :)

And for those of you who were wondering, you can see MY tongue-in-cheek "resolutions", complete with pictures and those provided by other bloggers, over at The Malcontent.

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