Blind Hatred Makes You Miss Targets

The best example so far: the discussion that ensued over at Box Turtle Bulletin upon my banning.

In short order, the people there:

-- Accused me of being a pedophile

I hope nobody is ever stupid enough to leave their little boys alone with him.

But no, I wouldn’t leave my nephews around him either.

-- Questioned my sexual orientation

If he’s really gay, then he has serious emotional problems, and I feel bad for him.

ND30, along with other kooks like former gay porn actor turned flop wannabe-FOX pundit Matt Sanchez, and a “michigan matt” all come from the “Gay Patriot” blog - aka the deranged sisters of Log Cabin Republicans.

The guys from that particular website has some issues - nothing more than walking Paul Cameron advertisements, and believing your average gay person is inferior to them.

Confused me with someone else entirely -- and then proceeded to publish that person's profile and information

You can’t get any gayer than gay.com! LOL:

Now consider Box Turtle Bulletin's "comment policy".

While we value a range of opinions, we may delete comments and/or ban or moderate commenters who engage in:

-- Threats, direct or implied. This can include implied threats through the posting of phone numbers, addresses, or places of business or employment.

-- The use of derogatory terms. Prohibited terms include (but are not limited to):

-- Terms which demean one’s personal appearance or mannerisms

In addition, commenters may be moderated or banned for persisting in any of following behavior:

-- Defamation against entire categories of people. This includes members of religious groups and political parties.

-- Unsubstantiated claims, for example, claims which are not backed by direct quotes, links, or bibliographic references from independent sources

-- Unsubstantiated rumors or speculations, particularly where sexuality or sexual behavior is concerned

What makes this really funny is that a simple thirty-second check of my blogsite would have made it clear that, if that's my Gay.com profile, it's in the wrong city, wrong physical description, wrong age, and totally unaware of the partner I already have. But why be accurate, when you know that you'll never be held accountable for such behavior by Jim Burroway, Daniel Gonzales, and Timothy Kincaid? It's all about the smearing, and these blog owners are more than willing to aid and abet such things when it's their ideological allies that are doing it.

As I said yesterday, gee, it's almost like they care less about content and what a person actually does than who that person is.....

UPDATE: Grabbed the Google Cache of the comments in question.

Second Update: Not surprisingly, Jim Burroway tried erasing the comments (which is why I grabbed the Google Cache).

Not good enough. As I pointed out above, their idiot commenters not only made all sorts of nasty remarks about me, but, in their attempts to do so, directly smeared someone who is in no way connected with me AND everyone over at GayPatriot. There needs to be a public retraction and an apology made to that person and the GayPatriot blog.

We Get Letters

And in several cases, they're more than entertaining.

As a gay man, as an American, as an HIV physician and academician at one of the more conservative medical institutions in the U.S, I can say without hesitation that your views remind me of the sad duplicity that arises in gay men who grow up in the Bible Belt. I was born and raised in Dallas, and still reside here, and I face constant personal and professional challenges due to the indoctrinated bigotry, Red State "values" and religious and cultural philistinism that plagues this town. You seem to cling to those philistine principles, but hypocritically deny the aspects that aren't compatible with your sexuality or your chosen family. As I kept reading your blog, I felt like I was being enclosed in a progressive, suffocating hysteria that was like being trapped in a housefire with the smoke rising to my nose. I was crawling on the ceiling, desperately looking for the chimney. Your repressed shame and self-doubt was so obvious beneath the grandstanding and stident lectures that you made Mary Tyler Moore in "Ordinary People" look like Robert Mapplethorpe.

What staggers me is that you abandoned the struggle for progress here in the South in favor of the tolerant comforts of San Francisco--a city whose inhabitants bled for the acceptance you enjoy there--and with staggering condescension and arrogance, you trash and condemn those who still fight for your freedom. It must be intensely empowering to write your judgmental blog--which is essentially a courtroom with a jury of one--with the city without a priori rejections right at your doorstep. You, sir, are guilty of the worst form of Uncle Tomism, and belong to a small, infuriating sect of gay men who make life exponentially harder for the rest of us.

I have some unfortunate news for you: your political party only approves of you until the election is over--after that they're embarrassed by you. Your church may "hate the sin and love the sinner", but most of them think you represent the sickest form of pathology and evil, and if it were socially-acceptable and legal, you and your partner would be hanging from a tree. Meanwhile, those idiot liberals you so hatefully condemn elected a mayor who is fighting for your right to have the love between you and your partner recognized in the eyes of society, the government, and God. There is true spirituality in that fight--if Jesus is your thing, he'd be standing by your mayor, not by the privileged polish and sanctimony of Sarah Palin.

I can only theorize that you're wearing Republicanism and Christianity and Conservatism as a facade to convince yourself that you can be gay and "normal" at the same time--and honestly, I think that's why the majority of Republicans cling to that party. For men at least, it's a form a hormone replacement therapy--it's all about guns and Biblical patriarchy and the expensive suit that hides the paunch. For both sexes, having that Bush '08 sticker on the minivan is an excuse to behave with reprehensible hypocrisy and still keep the membership in the country club. I know one thing--if Palin had won (McCain won't be around much longer, so let's dispense with the fiction), my partner of four years, who is from Germany and working to get a green card, would be sent home in a rowboat, and you and I would be tattooed and sweeping floors in a concentration camp. She's the political equivalent of Nurse Ratched, and when you're dealing with the company woman incarnate, the only way to keep order in the commune is to silence those that don't play by the rules. This means you, no matter how many quaint homilies you post on your blog. There's no room for gay couples on the Ark, big guy. You can try to outsmart them with the khakis and top siders and the short haircut, but they know how to smell a fox.

Of course you're entitled to your views. The liberals out there will make sure you always will be.

Which is, of course, why they keep sending these letters telling us how they know exactly why we do what we do and how wrong our views are, how very awful of persons we are, how no one else cares about, respects, or loves us, how anyone else who says they do is just lying, and how our only hope is to do exactly what they say and be grateful that they're still willing to forgive scum like us.

Please. I've seen too many Lifetime Original Movies to fall for that one.

Not Quite What I Preferred.....

but so it goes.

DelD over at Ace of Spades expresses my feelings nicely.

And on the bright side, my partner got who he wanted. :)

Misguided Angst

There is always a reason to read the fine print.

A 2,400-mile move west that once seemed like a chance at a fresh start, has instead delivered some hard lessons -- especially about moving from a state that recognizes same-sex unions to one of the 21 states that don't.

The couple was stunned when Ryan was dropped from the company insurance plan the two shared in New Jersey, where they were able to register as domestic partners. Idaho does not formally recognize same-sex couples.

"It didn't even dawn on us that this would have an impact," Ryan said.

At the same time, though, the company involved is playing games that can only be described as chickens--t.

A number of private insurance companies cover same-sex partners in Idaho, said Rep. Nicole LeFavour, D-Boise, who is the state's only openly gay legislator and is covered by a Wells Fargo insurance policy with her partner of eight years.

LeFavour said she called Konica Minolta on behalf of the couple and the company cited the constitutional amendment.

Simple fact of the matter: the constitutional amendment does not preclude companies from offering domestic partner benefits in Idaho. The reason Konica Minolta is not doing so is because they are choosing not to extend domestic partner benefits to couples that aren't legally registered as domestic partners in the state in which they live.

But of course, both sides are more than happy to blame someone or something else for the problem.

In The Moon of Converging Bloggers

My blogging, as a few of you have noted, has been a bit more sporadic of late, primarily because the past two months have been a whirlwind of trips for myself, trips by my partner (which means twice as much housework), and trips for both of us (well, someone has to use the hotel room). But, oddly enough, through a cosmic convergence of epic proportions, I have managed to meet more bloggers with whom I've previously communicated over the past three or so months than I have managed in the previous three or so years of North Dallas Thirty's existence.

-- In middle August, GayPatriotWest (who, admittedly, I had met before, but humor me) came up the coast from the City of Angels to admittedly non-sunny San Francisco to brunch with me and GayPatriot commentor ILoveCapitalism in the Castro.

Notable phrase: "I'm from LA. We drive."


-- In late October, I dined with not one, but two bloggers of high repute -- Famous Author Rob Byrnes and Aatom -- on a subtropical Saturday in the heart of the steamy isle of Manhattan.

Of course, all we did was gossip about Matt and Robbie. And drink. Not necessarily in that order.


-- In early November, while perusing which candy would represent the best dollar and going-off-my-diet value in the Walgreen's at Castro and 18th, I moved just in time to see two handsome men in Southern Cal red come running in -- and it turned out to be Boi from Troy and his sidekick Keenan, hoping to find some marvy new plastic ponchos to survive that night's game in what we northern Californians euphemistically call a "less dry evening".

They chose fab white, I chose Junior Mints.


-- Finally, this past weekend, I klatsched over kaffee in downtown SF with visiting expat, genius, and all-around great guy Kevin of Club Whirled -- who graciously forgave the fact that the first thing out of my mouth was the utterly-brain-dead phrase, "God, you look like a Kennedy."

Maybe that, or he figured that someone who was wearing shorts and flip-flops in December was just not all there in the first place.

At any rate, every one of the encounters was a great experience, and several of them have written glowing and extraordinarily-flattering bits about our meetings.

The rest is strictly secret. :)

Let's see, that leaves Matt and Robbie, QuakerJono, Jamie, John in IL, GayPatriot.......

UPDATE........and Chad....(rubbing very sore behind).......

Random Kosmicity

Labor Day weekend is drawing to a close here in San Francisco, the temperature gently falling from a toasty Indian-summer 80 to a thoroughly pleasant 60; a reminder indeed to all of us why, in addition to better architecture, finer culture, and less plastic surgery, we live here and not there. It was indeed a wonderful time, filled with visits from friends, delectable meals out, and the burly bearded bacchanal that is the Hairrison Street Fair.

Chief among these pleasures, though, was three consecutive days of more than eight hours of sleep -- a rare and exciting thing that has left me with a feeling I'm not sure I've had since high school. Normally, I function on a generous seven, sometimes six, and, too often than I should, five; this is like David Banda Mwale Ciccone Ritchie walking into his new bedroom.

As a result, though, I've had the occasional random odd thought, and one of them is this: I have never been single ever since I started blogging. And, oddly enough, both of the people I've been with -- the boyfriend I hooked up with almost the minute after I assumed the mantle of North Dallas Thirty, and then my partner who followed, have been liberal Democrats.

I'm not sure what the implications of this are, but if the general principles hold true.............GayPatriotWest and QuakerJono are in for one hell of a surprise.

The Power of Love

The case of Cecil Sinclair, a gay man whose funeral High Point Church in Arlington, Texas refused to host after they found out about his sexual orientation, has brought the usual howls of outrage from the usual suspects -- which, as QuakerJono succintly notes, seems inconsistent with their usual disdain for living gay people being associated with any church.

The best reaction I have seen, though, comes from the partner of the deceased himself, Paul Wagner.

Hopefully your reading this helps to make sense of what occurred. I fully understand the church’s right to deny us the use of their facilities. I also served in the military, (US Army, 1987-2002), and I have fought to defend their freedom of religion and freedom of choice.

If just one couple or family can be saved from having to suffer the same as we did, I would consider all this to have been worthwhile. I truly believe all congregations need to have more open communication between all their members, so that the person who had initially welcomed us into their church would have known that is was not acceptable in the eyes of their leaders, and the entire issue would have been avoided.

If we had known from the beginning we were not welcome, or the offer had never been made, we would have just continued making the same arrangements we finally had in the end. Nothing we did for Cecil's remembrance ceremony was changed, other than the location.

Now that is personal faith, turning the other cheek, and selflessness.

And it also drives home the wisdom of Proverbs 25:21 - 22 (and repeated in Romans 12:20):

If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat;
if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.

In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head,
and the LORD will reward you.

Thank you, Mr. Wagner. With your words, you've made the most powerful argument that one possibly can: the ability to respect and show love to those who have rejected you.

The very definition of "Christlike".

Warning to All Gay Conservatives and Republicans

Express your opinion like this......

David Keeton, a small-business owner in Dallas, and his partner, Rob Schlein, said they supported Giuliani because of his record as New York mayor and his response to the Sept. 11 terror attacks.

"I'm an American first, then a Republican second, and gay falls in third or fourth," said Keeton, who wore a Ronald Reagan pin on his lapel.

and expect a wonderful and loving response from the community which you supposedly belong and forever are encouraged to support, regardless of their opinions, because you share their sexual orientation.

Not that this is in any way unexpected; it's just a good reminder of the fact.

Misguided Ardor

I have to wonder what Michael over at GayOrbit is thinking with this post.

The lengths gay couples will go to protect themselves, and how it’s not enough. Anyone that says signing contracts and entering into other agreements is all we need to do is simply wrong.

The story he links to is about the attempt being made by the heirs of a wealthy family to prevent the lesbian lover of one of them, who was legally adopted by her partner as a means of supposedly protecting the lover, from collecting on trust payouts to be made to all grandchildren -- obviously, another case of a hateful and homophobic family trying to prevent a poor helpless gay partner from receiving their legal due.

Except when you read this part.

Spado and Olive Watson aren't together anymore. They separated in 1992, and while Spado received about $500,000 from Watson, there is nothing in court records to show any arrangement beyond that.

As far as I can tell, the logic here is that, if Olive Watson and her lover would have been allowed to marry, the family wouldn't be going through the legal mess to nullify the claim of a "granddaughter" who is one year older than her "mother", hasn't been in a relationship with her "mother" for fifteen years, and about whom the "mother" apparently forgot to tell her family.

Or put differently, "Marriage will cure stupidity in gays and lesbians."

True Courage.....

is being willing to speak out.

Especially in light of this.

Females between the ages of 16 and 24 are more vulnerable to intimate partner violence than any other age group -- at a rate almost triple the national average, according to a 2001 U.S. Department of Justice report.

About 1 in 3 teenagers reported knowing a friend or peer who had been hit, punched, kicked, slapped, choked or physically hurt by their partner, according to a February 2005 study on teen dating abuse from Teenage Research Unlimited, a national research firm specializing in youth.

Or, more troubling, this.

"No one really believed me," Sarah said. "Even though I had the bruises on my stomach, no one really cared."

Democrats We Love

Meet Ross Lajeunesse.

He's brainy, as he showed in his previous position as Chief of Staff and Chief Deputy Controller for the state of California.

He's got impeccable credentials, having worked for Democrats like Susan Kennedy and Steve Westly.

And he's now in a seat of enviable power, having accepted the role of Deputy Chief of Staff for newly-reelected Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger.

What makes this writer gush over him the most, though, is his statement in last week's Bay Area Reporter:

Same-sex marriage advocates should not count on LaJeunesse trying to convince the governor to sign a pro-gay marriage bill into law next year. He said he agrees with the position Schwarzenegger took in vetoing the bill in 2005, and besides, he is focused on other legislation.

"What I personally believe isn't that relevant," he said. "On the marriage issue he has clearly stated while he supports domestic partner rights and will defend those if need be, the people by referendum decided gay marriage is something that is not going to happen in California. Since the people have spoken in California that is the way it is."

LaJeunesse pointed out that the governor favors seeing either the courts rule on the matter or voters overturn the state's antigay marriage laws at the ballot box.

Either choice, he said, "makes a lot of sense legally and is correct as far as I am concerned."

That, my friends, takes guts on the level of telling Rosie O'Donnell to sit down and shut up.

And to it, I say, "Amen".

It is gays like Lajeunesse, current Schwarzenegger Chief of Staff Susan Kennedy, California Assembly candidates Steve Sion, Mark Patrosso, Brenda Green, Ralph Denny, and William Chan, that will help make and maintain progress in this state. Bravo to them all.

And for those of you out there looking for someone....Ross is single.....and those nights in Sacramento can be more than a little bit chilly.....

Really, It IS Simpler Than It Looks

Chris Crain, the former editor for the Washington Blade, has on his blog a piece discussing the impending retirement of Republican House member Jim Kolbe and the issues on which Chris feels Kolbe should speak out more.

By and by, it's fairly even-handed; however, there's one thing that caught my attention.

Ironically, Kolbe complains later in the interview that the Human Rights Campaign hasn't devoted more energy to extending Social Security survivor benefits to gay couples — a move that would require repealing the half of DOMA that goes unmentioned in the article.

Actually, that's not quite the case.

DOMA, as Chris correctly points out, prevents the Federal government from recognizing anything that isn't a man-woman coupling as a spouse or married.

However, that only causes a problem if Social Security conditions survivor's benefits on spousal or marital status.

Many private pension and retirement plans do not; they allow an employee to designate beneficiaries, who may or may not be related or married to them, to receive their accrued benefit upon their death. This process was made even easier and simpler by the past year's pension reform bill, which allowed such transfers to take place without an immediate tax hit regardless of the individual's relationship to the beneficiary.

Congress is more than capable of changing Social Security to match that; instead of requiring "spouse", they could with perfect right institute a beneficiary system in which you designate someone to receive your survivor benefits from Social Security regardless of their relationship or other status. Since you would no longer need to be a "spouse" to receive these benefits, DOMA would not be violated.

However, it kind of begs the question.......why bother?

To explain why, one need only take a look at what would happen under Social Security if my partner and I were married and I died. First off, because he isn't old enough or disabled, my partner would not have immediate access to my survivor's benefits in the first place; he would only be able to claim them if he were of a certain age and/or disability status. Second, even if he were of age or status, any amount that he could collect would be reduced relative to his income if he continued to work. If he begins to collect Social Security -- or is already collecting Social Security -- he gets the better of his direct benefits or what he can collect of my survivor's benefits, not both of them; in either case, he must take them as a cash distribution and be taxed accordingly. Finally, if he were to remarry, the government could with perfect right immediately terminate any survivor's benefits he was receiving.

In contrast, if I were to die, my private retirement plans would immediately pay out my accrued benefit to him as my beneficiary as he preferred, either as a taxable cash distribution or as a tax-free transfer into his own retirement account, there for him to invest as he sees fit and use when he needs it. He doesn't have to choose between his own retirement funds and mine; he gets both. Furthermore, he gets to keep both regardless of whether he remarries or not with no dimunition in their value.

This convoluted mess is why we found straight couples arguing for domestic partnerships in last year's battle over the Arizona marriage amendment; they're trying to dodge the fact that, if they get married, their Social Security payouts drop, either by the negation of survivor's benefits or the fact that the Social Security limit on payouts to their household is lower than the combined value of their benefits if considered separately.

In short, until meaningful reform to Social Security takes place, the argument over gay couples needing marriage to get Social Security benefits is pointless AND contradicted by the fact that straight couples are avoiding marriage so as not to lose Social Security benefits by getting married.

And the chances of a Democratic lapdog group like HRC advocating for meaningful changes to Social Security are about the same as that of Perez Hilton advocating for restraint in journalism.

And Mary Shall Be With Child....

Sorry, couldn't resist the Christmas reference. :)

Congratulations to Heather Poe and Mary Cheney on their announcement today that they are having a baby.

Of course, this news was greeted with the usual spitting and vitriol that comes from the gay left whenever Mary is mentioned; summing it all up, I think, is this lovely post wishing that the baby would be deformed and that Mary be rendered painfully infertile. Particularly amusing is their attempt to quote a piece from 2004 to prove how awful Virginia is for gays because state law allegedly prevents private businesses from extending domestic partner benefits -- despite the fact that said law was undone last year.

But this sort of thing is, after all, expected from those folks; what is more entertaining is when the sanctimonious "spokesperson" gays enter, such as Jennifer Chrisler, head of the Democratic money-laundering organization gay group Family Pride.

The couple "will quickly face the reality that no matter how loved their child will be. ... he or she will never have the same protections that other children born to heterosexual couples enjoy," Chrisler said. "Grandfather Cheney will no doubt face a lifetime of sleepless nights as he reflects on the irreparable harm he and his administration have done to the millions of American gay and lesbian parents and their children."

Of course, what is left out is that Chrisler and her partner, former Human Rights Campaign head Cheryl Jacques, previously dismissed the need for marriage to protect their children -- and, more amusingly, during the time their group and they were pumping money and endorsements to Democratic candidate John Kerry in support of his position on gay issues.

Which was?

According to Kerry, the same as Cheney's and, most interestingly..... Bush's.

"The president and I have the same position, fundamentally, on gay marriage. We do. Same position."

And, given his enthusiastic support of constitutional amendments to ban it, he followed through on that.

Yet Chrisler, Jacques, HRC, and the rest of the gay left called that position "pro-gay" and "gay-supportive", and gave tens of millions of dollars in cash, endorsements, staff time, and support to promote and push it -- all the while claiming that the "same position" on the other side was an "attack" causing "irreparable harm" to gays and lesbians.

It makes one think of the post-"Jews suck" cut-budget ending for Apocalypto.

(line of captives inches towards altar, head bowed, sobbing, as blood gushes by their feet, each one being sliced open and having his heart cut out, still beating.
Jaguar Paw reaches front of line; as priests reach for him......)

Jaguar Paw: Wait! No! It is horrible and repressive for you to cut out my heart and offer it to the god Snaky-Haired Monkey With Finger In Nose!

Head Priest: But we must, otherwise we will get no rain and our land and empire will crumble.

JP: I don't care. It's ALWAYS wrong to kill another human being! Your actions endanger my family and all others. I must protest and label you as evil, wicked, and smelly.

HP: All right, all right already, quit yelling! How about we sacrifice you and your family to the god Buck-Toothed Lemur With Horrible Anal Warts, who despite having the same position on human sacrifice, opposes everything which Snaky-Haired Monkey With Finger In Nose supports?

JP: Now THAT'S more like it! (jumps up onto altar)

(Horrible natural disaster intervenes, priests scream and go running away, Jaguar Paw chasing after them)

JP: Wait! WAIT! YOU FORGOT TO KILL ME!

Let's face facts. Mary Cheney takes a lot of sh*t from hypocritical activists like Chrisler, knows that every move she makes is going to be met with hate......and still has the strength and willingness to be public with her life.

I admire that.

Good luck, Heather and Mary.

Whither Adulthood

Paul Varnell, writing on the Independent Gay Forum, asks an interesting question: where are the gay adults?

His theory:

There are actually gay adults around in considerable numbers. They run gay businesses, the gay cultural institutions, the gay bars and clubs, the community health and social service organizations. But perhaps they are inconspicuous to young people focused on the bar, party and hook-up scene.

Still, there are millions of gay adult besides those. And indeed, where are they? Perhaps they withdraw from the gay community because they view being gay as largely about drinking, drugs, and fast-food sex. That is a sad misunderstanding. More than anything, gay is about Civic Life. The gay community is an affinity group. It is about interpersonal empathy, friendships, social and political progress and cultural creativity.

Well, if my partner and I are any example, there's a more prosaic reason; we're busy with other things instead. Between work, our respective professional groups, various organizations to which we belong, and attending other events, there are only so many hours left in the day. All the fundraising commitments I've made for this year have been out of personal time, and we've been strained and harried more often than not trying to balance the needs of work and our relationship with community events.

What that points out, though, is the root of the issue; namely, that gays are no longer limited to the gay-only world. As has happened with other groups which were kept together by popular disdain, the increasing acceptance of gays and lesbians outside the traditional borders has, while providing many more opportunities, significantly changed the character of the community left behind. An apt analogy is the "middle class creep" that is quite often identified as a major cause of the problems in the black community; namely, when those who can take advantage of new opportunities elsewhere do so en masse, what remains is like brine -- highly concentrated, less diverse, and progressively more unpalatable.

To an enormous degree, I think it is important that gays continue to push the envelope in terms of public involvement and life outside the gay community. We SHOULD strive to be more involved in our work, our cities, our neighborhoods, our schools, and in other places where our presence among straight people does much to dispel the popular stereotypes of gays as sex-crazed, drug-shooting, leather-wearing circuit boys and undercuts the argument of social extremists who keep trying to portray our lives as threats to Mom, America, and apple pie.

At the same time, however, it is imperative that we bring back this widened perspective to our brethren and proactively work to keep our historic and social communities from collapsing into suspicious, paranoid enclaves. Like the black and ethnic ghettoes, we cannot afford to have the gay community develop mores, culture, and attitudes that actively resist what they see as "outside influence", reject change, and perpetuate destructive behaviors, all out of ignorance or fear. The last thing the universe needs is the homosexual analogue to hip-hop music.

No one in our community should feel constrained by their sexual orientation; you should feel free to live, do, vote, and be what you like, regardless of it. However, we should always keep in mind that those of us who can and do operate outside of the day-to-day gay must share that perspective with those who can't.

Paccione May Have Done It; The Ted Haggard Case

Bold statement, I know.

But, based on my interpretation of the evidence, that's what I think happened.

First, the overall story, for those of you who missed it; Mike Jones, a male prostitute in Denver, Colorado, accused Reverend Ted Haggard, pastor of New Life Church in Colorado Springs and president of the National Association of Evangelicals, of having a three-year affair with him and purchasing/using methamphetamines from him. Haggard, while admitting that he did purchase methamphetamines from Jones, insists that he did not use them and that he only contacted Jones for a massage.

Towards my postulate, here's the evidence in order.

Item 1: the male prostitute in question flunked the lie detector test which he insisted on having.

Item 2: the male prostitute in question is in significant financial trouble and, despite insisting that he has given up both selling drugs and himself, was advertising his wares in a November 1 magazine issue.

Those two items establish both that the source is, at best, questionable, and that there is significant financial and legal incentive for him to cooperate with any proffered golden keys or incentives.

Item 3: the political situation. Allegations against Haggard would primarily affect the evangelical vote, especially in Colorado. That could affect two major points -- one, the amendments to ban gay marriage and enact a domestic partner registry that are on the ballot, and the hotly-contested race between Marilyn Musgrave and Democratic challenger Angie Paccione.

As it turns out, this race is a cause celebre for the gay leftist community, mainly because of Musgrave's sponsorship and authorship of the Federal Marriage Amendment and Marriage Protection Act. Blogs such as John Aravosis's Americablog (look under the "banned" on the sidebar blogrolls) have not only taken it upon themselves to raise thousands of dollars for Paccione, but have offered their political support and assistance of the gay community to her.

Interestingly enough, Americablog has strong ties to the blog Blogactive and its proprietor, Mike Rogers, who is expert in the practice of making false accusations and bringing forth "anonymous" sources about peoples' sexual orientation, and who regularly solicits information in order to blackmail and harm conservative and religious (not Democrat) individuals. Indeed, John Aravosis has regularly praised Rogers and supported his efforts, including his recent attempts to claim (via "anonymous sources") that Senator Larry Craig is a criminal who has sex with men in public restrooms.

Given the links to both the Paccione campaign and Rogers, one need only put two and two together. While I have no direct evidence that Paccione was involved, the connections between her and these bloggers, as well as the similarity of the tactics used to those previously employed by Rogers and Aravosis, is quite a compelling argument that she may have been.

Perhaps Paccione should clarify her relationship with these bloggers, issue a public statement that she would not engage in such tactics, and, as a show of her good faith, return any donations that said sites have collected and repudiate their actions in supporting outing and vicious mischaracterizations of her opponent.

After all, it's what she would demand Musgrave do.

Tell Them Lies, Tell Them Sweet Little Lies

It makes you want to absolutely beat your head against a wall.

The latest example of inanity from the gay left, in regards to last night's debate over pending legislation in Colorado:

Focus on the Family policy analyst Jim Pfaff and Lawyer Pat Steadman squared off in a debate over the two measures Monday night.

Focus on the Family is the main supporter of the proposed amendment. Steadman, a longtime gay advocate, helped write the civil unions proposal, known as Proposition I

Pfaff said that if voters approve civil unions it would open the door to gay marriage. "The lawsuits are not going to stop," he said, adding that since 1990 lawsuits brought by same-sex couples have produced eight "substantive changes" to marriage law.

But Steadman disagreed saying that if New Jersey had something Prop I the marriage issue likely would never have gone to the high court.

"Because of that, the court ordered the legislature to create something like Referendum I or legalize gay marriage in New Jersey," Steadman said.

"We're solving that problem without going to court in Colorado by voting yes on Referendum I. We're going to create that opportunity for couples to have the same legal protection under state law, so there's nothing to complain about in a court of law."

Oh really?

The New Jersey Senate passed a statewide domestic partner bill on Thursday "without a word of opposition," the Associated Press reported, on a 23-9 vote.

A bill, which one should add, looked very much like Proposition I.

And we all know what happened next, right?

Indeed, looking at the states that have passed domestic partnership registries or civil unions, the one thing that they all have in common is that their doing so has produced a steady stream of lawsuits -- by gay leftists seeking to have the laws overturned and marriage imposed, regardless of the benefits granted.

In short, Pat Steadman is lying. Worse, he's lying in a manner that is patently obvious with a fifteen-second Google search. I mean, really; do you think these people don't know that the gay community's two biggest addictions are tobacco and filing lawsuits?

Both Chris Crain and Andrew Sullivan are positing today that the issue crippling those fighting against antigay amendments and legislation is "self-censorship". Their argument is that we "cannot run" from the marriage fight and must instead focus directly and honestly communicating with the voters on the issue at hand, instead of sidestepping.

Of course, it would help if we showed that we could be honest with voters in the first place.

Trying For That 16th Minute

Poor Jim McGreevey.

His book isn't selling well, the talk show circuit is wearing thin, and the reception he received in our gay city-state wasn't quite what he expected.

So what's a washed-up gay celeb supposed to do? Try to catch the latest wave.

Former Gov. James McGreevey, who resigned after acknowledging a gay affair, said he would tie the knot with his partner if state lawmakers decide to allow gay marriage.

"Marriage would offer the ability to bless our relationship in a committed way," McGreevey, 49, told The New York Times............

Some gay-rights advocates said the decision didn't go far enough. McGreevey, who told The Associated Press last month that he had publicly opposed gay marriage while in office as a way to keep his homosexuality hidden, hailed the ruling.

"I applaud the court's courage," McGreevey told the AP. "I regret not having had the fortitude to embrace this right during my tenure as governor."

I have to admit, McGreevey's gotten good at knowing which buttons activate the brain bypasses wired into most gay activists. Appeal to "commitment", talk all lovey-dovey about your partner, and play to the fantasy that the only reason people don't support gay marriage is because they're really closeted homosexuals -- the old tried-and-true methods, all there.

However, hearing a Democrat claim they voted against gay marriage because they were terrified people would find out they were gay means one of two things -- either the Democratic Party is not as friendly to gays as they would like us to believe, or the dating pool for homosexuals is a majority of the people in both New Jersey and the United States.

I lean towards the former.

And as for "blessing our relationship in a committed way", I think the last paragraph of the article says it all:

McGreevey now lives with Mark O'Donnell, a 43-year-old Australian businessman. Before they could marry, the former governor would have to finalize his divorce from his second wife.

Third time's a charm, maybe?

Two words of advice for O'Donnell.....prenuptial agreement.

And, as an engagement present, here's a couple of handy boyfriend locators for him.

To Everything, Turn, Turn, Turn

There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:

a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,

a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,

a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

Ecclesiastes 3: 1 - 8

And with that, friends, I would like to formally announce that my days as an independent blogger are on indefinite hiatus.

The first and foremost reason why is my partner. Until you move in with one, you don't fully realize how it reorders your priorities. Obviously there are duties of home and hearth, but most importantly, I find myself wanting to spend more and more of my time with him -- which leaves less and less for blogging.

Second off, I was recently selected to take part in an exciting and edifying effort to help raise funds and awareness of issues facing people with HIV/AIDS here in the community. This hearkens back to my activist roots, but again takes more time away from putting electrons to screen.

What this all adds up to is that it is time to take a step back. I will be maintaining this site as an archive and may occasionally post things here; however, I am actively seeking other opportunities to co-blog or freelance-contribute to other blogs, rather than maintaining a separate site.

Again, thanks to all of you. I'll be keeping the same email (northdallasthirty - at - yahoo.com) and will let you know where I am publishing.

Good night, and God bless.

Breaking News

Tonight, since it was Dining Out For Life night here in San Francisco, I met my partner down in the Castro proper at Starbears (which, for those of you not familiar with our furry subculture, is the correct name for the Starbucks located on 18th Street at Castro), planning to go grab a bite to eat at one of the participating restaurant.

My husbear is an inveterate conversationalist, especially with other cute bears, and I was more than a bit impatient to get going, certain we were not going to get a table. Finally, he wrapped up, and we headed back up 18th to the Castro intersection. While we were waiting for the crosswalk signal, I turned to speak to one of our friends who had accompanied us to the corner.

Suddenly, from up Castro towards Market -- behind me -- I heard a noise -- squealing of brakes, the slamming of metal. I distinctly remember thinking, "Great, another grocery truck. Why do they always sound like they're falling apart?"

Then the loud BOOM of an explosion echoed down the street.

I spun instantly and saw the unthinkable; a car, facing us, going the wrong way on Castro, smashed hood and headlights...and off to one side raging angrily, an orange glow that immediately sent fear stabbing through my back at a remembered memory.....gasoline fire.

"Come on, get across," I said, grabbing my partner's arm as he stared at the fire, virtually pulling him across Castro, instincts driving me to move, get the hell away. In what seemed like an instant, we were across; I turned to look back -- and saw a long tongue of fire pouring down Castro, racing under the cars parked along the curb, their tires starting to smoke, running towards the corner on which, seconds ago, we had been standing

Fear gripped me. I expected a hail of exploding metal any second.

"Get moving! We've got to get AWAY from this!" Slowly I herded them up 18th, the crowds slowly backing away from the blazing inferno. Sirens wailed; the buzz of a news helicopter who happened to be in the right place at the right time echoed off the buildings as we ducked through the Walgreens's back parking lot and up Collingwood. The fire engines were racing down Market as we re-crossed Castro, and they were more than needed -- the smoke was thickly billowing over the front of businesses, the single engine that had instantly responded from the nearby house valiantly pumping foam onto the licking flames.

Later, after a nervous dinner at Blue, we walked back towards the Castro, not sure what we were going to see, worried about our friends, and fearing the worst.

At the corner, we met one of our acquaintances comforting another man, who gave us more details. As it turns out, the car facing the wrong way had turned left from Market onto Castro, running the red light, careened out of control, and struck a row of motorcycles. That had triggered the fire; the gas torn out of the bikes kept it going. His bike had been completely destroyed; others were badly damaged. One person who had been sitting in a parked car and was struck was confirmed dead; the driver of the wrecked car was badly injured. Fortunately, most people who had been on the sidewalk were able to get inside, into one of the near storefronts....it could have been a lot worse.

Crowds were gathered along the police tape as we crossed over to the west side of Castro, looking almost in disbelief at the damage. A row of cars were parked askew along the curb, hoods torn open, some with crumpled bodies, blackened with smoke and soot. Fuzio's looked OK, All-American Boy wasn't showing much damage, but the famous red awning above Clift's Variety Store, a Castro icon, was melted and falling, and the paint on the building was yellowed with the heat and fumes. Next to it, the white lettering on A Different Light's black awning was grayish and coated with charred particles.

As we stood there staring, my partner said very quietly, "Do you realize that we were just seconds away from walking right into the middle of that?"

We, and likely a few hundred others.

With the density of the Castro's population, plus the fact that it was a nice evening with several people out for the Dining Out for Life event, someone or something was definitely looking out for the homosexuals tonight. My sympathies and prayers are with the victims and their families.

A video of the fire and aftermath is on the Channel 5 site; the San Francisco Chronicle site has more details. I'll let you know more as information is made public.

What's Really Important

Tomorrow marks the 100th anniversary of the Great Quake -- the almost complete destruction of the city of San Francisco by a massive temblor and resulting fire.

As one might expect, the city has been gearing up for this for months, with exhibits, memorials, and other events outlining the damages, the suffering, and the immediate reaction and long-term consequences of the disaster. If you've been watching The History Channel or other such networks, you've seen or will be seeing numerous retrospectives.

Like it or not, San Francisco lives both in spite of and because of the 1906 quake. The utter devastation of much of the city laid open a path for a complete infrastructure redesign and restructuring, led by visionary mayors and city engineers, that laid the groundwork capable even today of supporting a city whose needs were scarcely even imagined when it was built. The ability of leaders today to engage in needless bickering and posturing is due in no small part to the fact that they don't have to worry about mundane day-to-day operations; all that was anticipated when the city was built.

However, that relative lack of worry has transformed into a singular lack of concern about seismic activity, despite the fact that the Bay Area represents one of the most densely-populated and built-upon fault areas on the planet. Not one, not two, but eight faults cross the region -- yet, even with the reminder of the 1989 Loma Prieta quake, the contracts for seismic retrofit and reinforcement of the Bay Bridge and Transbay Tunnel have either just been or are about to be awarded.

Contracts, folks. Not construction or completion, despite the fact that the two public works in question move literally hundreds of thousands of vehicles and people on a daily basis and were compromised almost to the point of collapsing fifteen years ago.

You can go on and on -- the building codes that weren't revised until the late '70s, the drive to get rid of San Francisco's fireboats despite the fact that they represent the only way of reliably getting water to fires in the absence of mains -- you get the idea. But I think a far better way of showing it are the projections of what could happen if a similar quake struck today.

Pretty sobering.

What amuses (or appalls) me is this state's priorities. Spending billions of dollars on universal preschool is all well and good, but that will be little comfort to four-year-olds when they don't see their parents for weeks -- because they were unlucky enough to be on opposite sides of the Bay when the Tube and Bay Bridge collapsed. The irony, of course, is that universal preschool will then be unnecessary -- given that, without transit links, city services, and other things, their parents will now have plenty of time to spend on them, since their jobs and companies will have dried up and blown away. It will be interesting to see how San Francisco's cottage protest industry survives once city government is forced to actually spend money on work rather than on pandering, or how its constant avoidance of efficiency by raising tax rates manages when half of the property in the city is erased.

More than all that, it makes me mad. If a quake comes, right now, there are three possibilities; one, I'm at home and safe, two, I'm at work and stuck in Oakland, and three, I'm in transit and hoping a 40-year-old system that's already been strained by one earthquake survives a second one long enough to get me out of it.

Two out of the three have me separated from my partner, likely unable to communicate with him, and wondering whether he's alive or dead.

That tends to reorder what you think is important. Perhaps it's time Nunez, the Assembly, Schwarzenegger, and others remembered that.