You can practically write them from a template.
"We at the (insert your advocacy group name here) are shocked by the recent discovery that studies indicate that gay men (list bad behavior) at a rate (insert amount) many times greater than the population average, that nearly (insert number of) gay men (insert related bad behavior here) at least once, and that gays who (another bad behavior) are far more likely to test positive for HIV.
Drastic measures must be taken. The (insert your advocacy group name here) cannot stand back and allow these destructive patterns to continue in the gay community. We are in a fight for our very existence, and quick action is necessitated.
The crystal meth epidemic among gays is obviously an attempt by (list Republican politician), (list prominent religious figure), and (insert villain of the week) to destroy the gay community. They and their cronies at (insert drug company name) have joined together to eliminate us while fattening Big Pharma's profits. Please send us all your money so that we can file a lawsuit to stop (insert other drug company name) from forcing gays to (list bad behavior) through their advertising for (insert erectile-dysfunction drug name) and their collusion to raise the prices on (insert HIV drug name) and so that we can give freely to (insert homophobic Democrat politician) in support of our right to (insert right-of-the-week).
Join us today. Send your donation to (insert your group's address here)."
One would think that, after the innumerable epidemics, waves, outbreaks, scourges, and whatnot that the gay community has suffered for decades, we would have figured out by that many of the causes of these are the result of choices made by the individual whose hair you are looking at in the mirror each day -- and focused our efforts on dealing with that.
Of course, one who would think that underestimates the power of the human mind to ascribe blame to someone else for their problems.
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